The Rookie Caregiver

TRC

Caregiving 101

On or about 2014, I learned mom was almost blind from an issue with a nerve in one eye and glaucoma in the other. She lived alone in her home and so safety was a concern. I switched her flip phone to a smart phone and set up Google Voice on it so that she could call me, my sister or friends whenever she needed. Otherwise, she could take care of herself.

I visited mom once a week to make sure she had groceries and any other needs. My sister took care of her finances, and we shared the task of taking mom to doctor, dentist and other appointments she needed.

In April 2022, my sister suddenly passed away from cancer and mom was now my full responsibility. There were other members of the family, but no one able to care for mom. I had a full time job and a side business and so I was completely caught off guard and unprepared for the responsibility that was now in front of me.

In this section and what I call "Caregiving 101", I share the tasks I had to focus on first and immediately. Your experience may be different.

This website describes all the issues I encountered beginning in 2022 involving mom’s finances, housing needs, healthcare needs and more. For each topic, I’ll share a brief experience with mom and then provide general information and resources that I hope will help you in your journey.

I started building this website in August 2024 shortly after mom passed away and while information was still fresh on my mind. One of the first lessons I learned was that no one will understand what you are going through unless they have experienced this caregiving journey. I hope this website begins to shed some light about this experience to those who don't know or understand. This experience can be frustrating, stressful, very disruptive to your life and fulfilling all at the same time. And, if you have aging parents, aging grandparents or other loved ones that you may be responsible for in the future, you will experience this caregiving journey. The age of the cargiving recipient doesn't matter since anyone can become afflicted by illness or injury at anytime forcing them to become dependent on others for their care.

My experience occurred in Florida. If you live in another state, access to local resources in your area may not appear on this website at first. But I am continuously working to research and share information to include resources for other states wherever possible. There will be federal resources listed as well as private sector services offered across several states that you can take advantage of.

It is my sincere hope that this website helps to reduce the stress, anxiety and frustration that you may experience on your caregiving journey.

Where you begin depends a great deal on your current situation. Below are important areas to pay attention to.

Banking

Understanding your loved one's bills and banking information may be very important especially if your aging loved one is unable to manage their finances.

Bank Accounts

Advanced Directives

Advance directives are legal documents that provide instructions for medical care and only go into effect if your aging loved one cannot communicate their wishes. The two most common advance directives for health care are the living will and the durable power of attorney for health care. Make sure these documents exist, and you have access to them.

Important Documents

Assisted Living Facility

Navigating assisted living facilities (ALF) is complicated and time consuming. There are many facilities to choose from some of which are very good while others are not. In Florida, the average cost of an ALF is $4000 per month. Your aging loved one may not need an ALF now, but it's important to understand what your options are so that you don't rush into an ALF decision later.

Assisted Living - General Info

Insurance Cards

Having your aging loved one's insurance information immediately available is important. You don't want to stress through finding this information when a sudden emergency room visit happens.

Insurance Cards

Driver License or ID Card

Alongside insurance info, having a valid ID is important when visiting emergency rooms or working with notary's so sign legal documents such as Advanced Directives. Know where your aging loved one's ID is located and make sure it's current.

Driver License or ID Card

Medical History

Medical history plays a crucial role in the care and well-being of aging loved one. If/when you take your aging loved to the emergency room or a doctor visit, you will be asked for medical history. This is information you don't what to be guessing about because it can impact your loved one's diagnosis and care.

Medical History